Editing The Pen Addict 108/transcript (section)

== Avril Lavigne ==


'''Brad Dowdy:''' So where did the name Funkmon come from? I mean, I don't even know what the hell that means.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' Yeah, well, I don't either. I think I was, I think I may, I don't really know, but I may have mistyped something when I was 10. And I registered that, that username on a online forum or something. And then I've just always used it. And if you Google Funkmon, it's pretty much entirely me. Like, there was a point when it was only me. But someone's got like funkmonkey.com. So sometimes that shows up. But yeah, I think I'm the only Funkmon there is. So if you Google it, you're going to get a lot of results about fountain pens and Avril Lavigne. And I think that's pretty much it.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' So you have an Avril Lavigne fascination? Is that what you're saying? Or?

'''Tim Fletcher:''' I'm a, you know, yes and no. I'm a big Avril Lavigne fan. I really like her music. It's great. And there's a, the largest English speaking music fan site online is an Avril Lavigne website, believe it or not. So she actually has a large following around the world. Not so big in the United States or in other Anglophone countries. But in countries where they can't understand what she's saying, they love her. I don't know what that's meant to say. Well, Jerry, she's a boy. Let me, let me tell you some of her fabulous lyrics. He was a skater boy. She said, see you later, boy. Yeah, that's pretty special. Wow.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' That is deep. Man. You know, the things you learn on the Pen Addict podcast are amazing.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' It is amazing, isn't it?

'''Brad Dowdy:''' So I want to, I want to get into a couple of your pen reviews, actually. And the Metropolitan was one of them. But the first one I saw, the Cross Adventura.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' Oh, that was a very small review.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' I just wrote it on the paper. Yeah.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' My pull quote from that review is, this is the worst pen ever made.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' It's not long.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' Can you elaborate?

'''Tim Fletcher:''' Well, I, someone asked me a question about it on Reddit a little while ago. And I tried to explain how bad this pen was. And I said, if you made a pen out of oven mitt and then gave it to a monkey nibmeister with only garbage disposal for hands to affix the nib, you'd have a pen better than the Cross Adventura. Wow.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' Yeah.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' It looks cheap. It feels cheap. And it writes as well as could be expected for, I don't know, a dry noodle with no ink on it. That's about how well it writes. I had to quit writing a review because it sucked so bad.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' Yeah. I don't think I've ever owned a Cross Pen, much less a Cross Fountain Pen. How about you, Myke?

'''Myke Hurley:''' I bought a Cross Pen for this show once. I can't even remember what it's called, though. The one where you kind of pull it apart.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' Yeah, it was a short one, but that was like a rollerball one. That one actually seemed like a pretty decent design.

'''Myke Hurley:''' Yeah, the design's cool, the mechanism's cool, and the ink is nice. I just don't like the way it feels in the hand. It's uncomfortable to hold, but I've never owned or used a Cross Fountain Pen.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' Yeah, me neither. Me neither. I think you guys have made a good choice.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' Let me tell you how dumb I am. I just bought another one three days ago, a Cross Dubai Fountain Pen. Same $15 price tag, and I thought, oh, well, this will be a laugh. I'll have another terrible review. It's actually not the worst pen in the world. It is a mediocre pen with nothing notable about it whatsoever, which means it could be the best pen Cross has made.

'''Myke Hurley:''' Yeah, that's like worse than a really bad pen is to have just a mediocre pen because then you can't even write a funny review about it.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' Yeah, I'm trying to fill 2,000 words or something on this pen, but most of it has just been insults on the Cross Aventura pen. I have a picture that I photoshopped of Hitler using the Aventura pen just to explain how bad this pen is.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' That is amazing. I'd actually be curious to know if there is such a thing as a good Cross Fountain Pen, so maybe some listeners have had some experience. No one ever asks. I mean, Cross is not in the forefront of anyone's reviews or talking about pen, so maybe you can be the crappy Cross pen guy.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' Oh, God. That would be a fate worse than death. But I think you're absolutely right, which is remarkable in that I think Cross, maybe second only to Parker, has name recognition outside of the fountain pen community, I guess. When someone says, okay, maybe Mont Blanc, but if someone says I've got a really fancy pen, they either think Parker, Cross, or Mont Blanc, at least from my experience. That's what they think, and then I have to explain I would never use it.

'''Myke Hurley:''' Just great marketing.

'''Brad Dowdy:''' Yeah, and I totally agree with that. I mean, I get emails about, you know, this always comes up in the graduation time of year because everyone sees those Cross gift pens and things like that, and I try to steer them away for the most part. Not that I'm totally negative on Cross just for a basic pen, just that you can do better if you do a little looking around and get some recommendations.

'''Tim Fletcher:''' You can do better if you didn't look around and just held your hand out and picked something. Even if you were in a grocery store, it would be a better pen. I bought a banana. Yeah, a better pen.